This is a blog I started in order to write shit down when I travelled so I’d remember it regardless of how many brain calls I systematically replaced with house white wine over the following years. Hopefully it’ll help people plan their trip but it probably won’t because it’s largely a self-indulgent collection of poorly punctuated posts littered with enough unnecessary swear words to make Gordon Ramsey blush. Basically I just like doing cool stuff and looking at pretty shit then telling the Internet about it.
Listed below in reverse order of visiting, because alphabetical would make life far too easy. Click on it to be taken to the relevant blog posts which will also all be listed in reverse order because that’s pretty much just how blogs work.
The most recent shit I’ve gotten around to posting. It’s in reverse order, because of course it is.
Hadrian’s Wall Path, Days 1 and 2(9/24/2019)-I have no idea what satanic hell-beast possessed us to make us think that hiking 84 miles from Bowness-on-Solway to Newcastle-upon-Tyne across the narrowest part of England would be any manner of relaxing, but that’s how we chose to spend a week of annual leave in September as colleagues raised an eyebrow and suggested that […]
Two Nights On Dartmoor(7/3/2019)-Well Dartmoor started off well enough with lovely, defined trails and well placed stiles that were taller than we are. For all intents and purposes, Dartmoor was a fucking doddle, despite the clouds looming closer, the kind of clouds you don’t really want to see when you’re just embarking on a three day hike with […]
A Rainy Day On Gozo(3/16/2019)-We were up at an hour even the ubiquitous sparrows would have raised a sleepy eyebrow at to catch an early ferry over to Gozo with the intention of watching the sunrise from Malta’s smaller sister. Yeah nah so that wasn’t going to happen. As we sat in the small queue of cars to board […]
A Day Of Purposeful Meandering(3/14/2019)-We fully intended to walk every inch of Comino today, the tiny, car-free island between Malta and Gozo, but it seemed the ferries weren’t running, possibly on account of the fact the winds of the other day had started up again. We got to the ferry terminal (the Gozo one is obvious) and were directed […]
Wreck Diving In Malta(3/13/2019)-The diving gods must have been smiling on me when I booked my day of diving a few weeks ago. Yesterday the winds were so bad there would have been no way to safely enter and exit the water but today was beautiful and calm with not a cloud in the sky, though I was […]
More Temples And A Sod Off Great Big Church(3/12/2019)-Today we’d be heading to the Ħal Saflieni Hypogeum and we figured we’d get a bus to save us dicking around with parking. As we loitered outside waiting for it to open, periodically wiping the grit from our eyes that the brutal fucking winds sweeping across the island kept depositing in there, Tarrant asked, “What […]
Fishing Boats And Stone Age Temples(3/11/2019)-We chose Malta before we researched it on account of it being really fucking tiny. Seriously, you could stand on one side and spit to the other. I mean, don’t, because that would be gross. But you could. We wanted an entire country that we could potentially see in a week and given that the […]
Bako Is The Best(10/18/2017)-Our final Sarawak national park was to be Bako which is probably the most popular of the lot despite it being an absolute ball ache to get to. You can’t just nip there, you can only get in and out by boat but despite this you’ll still need to think about booking your accommodation several […]
The Beast That Is Mt Santubong(10/13/2017)-Mount Santubong is the big, pointy mountain that you can’t fucking miss as you ride into Santubong unless you’ve had your eyes gouged out by an angry macaque because you refused to hand over your crisps. It looks steep. It is steep. I don’t know why we thought we were in any manner of physical […]
Even More Massive Flowers(10/12/2017)-Gunung Gading is home to the rafflesia, the fuck off great big flower we’d seen in Poring but wanted to put in our eyeholes again, largely because we were on a Sarawak National Park mission. It’s pretty out of the way though and there’s not much point in going if it’s not blooming but they […]