A Love/Hate Coffee Affair And Some Lightning

After I bid Freddy goodbye and jumped off the bus in Barquisimeto, I had it in my naïve little head that I'd be able to get a bus straight away to Mérida, one of Venezuela's most popular tourist destinations, slap bang in the middle of the high season. My delusions were soon brought crashing down [...]

Salto Ángel: Size Matters

Size does matter, sorry guys but it's the truth. Why else would anyone pay the slightly ridiculous amounts of money to fly into Parque Nacional Canaima to check out Salto Ángel if it wasn't the highest motherfucking single drop waterfall in the whole damn world at 979 metres? Hmm? Why indeed. Once you've parted with [...]

Roraima: What In Hell Was I Thinking?

My dad and my sister, both military reserve types, like to say that pain is weakness leaving the body. I say that pain is an excuse to sit down and drink beer which is exactly what we did at the end of day five after the epic walk down the tepui. Fuck me backwards it [...]

A Day On The Lost World

Roraima 101. It's one of a range of tepuis that stretch through Parque Nacional Canaima in Venezuela, a tepui being a flat topped mountain that holds particular spiritual significance for the indigenous people known collectively as the Pemon people which, as Marco told us, isn't entirely accurate. There are three tribes that inhabit the Gran [...]

Roraima: The Epic Climb

Fucking puri-puri. It doesn't matter how much you cover yourself with clothing or coat yourself with a layer of DEET or that hippy baby oil plus Vitamin B12 crap, as soon as you drop your trousers to pee they hone in on your pasty white arse reflecting in the moon light as the welts on [...]

Roraima Day 1: I’m Not Sure Why I’m Doing This

I'm not too sure how I found out about the Roraima Trek in Venezuela's Gran Sabana, part of the breath-taking Parque Nacional Canaima. It's in the Lonely Planet so it could have been that or maybe it was because I met a few people whilst I was holed up in Manaus feeling very sorry for [...]

And Exactly What Are You Doing In Venezuela?

I admit it, I was already a wee bit stressed about Venezuela after all the stories of police corruption I'd heard from travellers that were passing through Manaus fresh from the country, but I had my little heart set on a few places and with the political situation in the country rapidly deteriorating (don't ask [...]